Make A Plan To Love Me

I found a song by Bright Eyes called "Make a Plan to Love Me", which really intrigues me. How can you make a plan to love someone? Is it as simple and rational as all that? Can you make a plan to love someone, say in a month or six months? Or is this the 21st century relationship? This is very much a professional issue for me, as a planner. I mean, how much can you actually plan? Can anyone explain?


Make A Plan To Love Me

I heard you're scheming new pyramids
Another big idea to get you rich
Make a plan to love me sometime soon

You said you got a foot in the door
You buy and then you sell, you buy some more
Make a plan to love me sometime soon

Life is too short
Death doesn't ask
It don't owe you that

Some things you lose
You don't get back
So just know what you have

And make a plan to love me sometime soon

First you want to ride off into the Sun
Then you want to shoot straight to the Moon
Make a plan to love me sometime soon

When you are young the world is a Ferris Wheel
I know we will grow old it is lovely, still
Make a plan to love me sometime soon

Life is too short
To be a fool
I don't owe you that

Do what you feel
Whatever is cool
But I just have to ask

Will you make a plan to love me?
Will you make a plan to love me?
Will you make a plan to love me sometime soon?

Good Habits

I just managed to swim for another hour, fourth day in a row this week. I'm doing something right!

The Smile of Evil

I read Marianne Fredrikssons "The Smile of Evil" this week. I like Fredrikssons books, her psychological insights, her characters and her stories. I especially liked her biblical trilogy on Eva, Kain and Norea. This was a modern story again, about a woman who has come out of a violent marriage. I am not too sure about this one, though, some of the storylines were a little convenient.

Fredriksson died last February, so this was her last novel. What I like about Fredriksson is that, while getting involved with the story and the characters, she manages to write lines that stick out and that you remember and that make you think again. I'm sorry she won't be writing more memorable lines.

R&R

Sometimes the idea of a desert island becomes really appealing, some time on my own in a remote corner of the world somewhere. I may not necessarily always choose the traditional island, I can think of some nice ones way down south where I wouldn't mind spending a couple of weeks on my own. Then again, a nice sandy beach with lots of sunshine, a few palm trees for my hammock, warm water for swimming sounds pretty good too. But I guess in the end you don't get to choose the island where you get stuck.

And then I get to take my very own Desert Island Discs, of course:
Eleni Mandell - Miracle of Five
Christy Moore - Live in Dublin 2006
Luka Bloom - Radio Bremen
Zita Swoon - Band in a Box
An Pierlé - White Velvet
Sarah Bettens - Scream
Mika - Life in Cartoon Motion
Bright Eyes - Cassadaga
Bach - Cello Sonatas 1027-1029 (Martha Argerich & Mischa Maisky)
Leonard Cohen - Ten New Songs

(And yes, I know it's supposed to be just 8, but this seems like a well-balanced set, and why should you stick to all the rules stuck out there on a Desert Island? And anyway, ask again in a week and half my choices will have changed again. I like making lists.)

Then there is the book. I get to take Shakespeare and the Bible, but I've read both. I guess they are good enough to reread though. Which reminds me of one of the most beautiful pieces of poetry Shakespeare wrote, suitable for the situation:

"Be not afeard. The isle is full of noises,
Sounds and sweet airs that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices
That, if I then had waked after long sleep,
Will make me sleep again; and then, in dreaming,
The clouds methought would open, and show riches
Ready to drop upon me, that when I waked,
I cried to dream again."

But I digress. I still have to pick another book to bring, and that is the hard part. I am not good at making choices, and then to talk about books. I mean, what book is going to keep me occupied for a long time while I'm out there? I'd probably end up picking poetry, Emily Dickinson, R.S. Thomas or W.B. Yeats. If it was to be a novel, it might be Bleak House or Middlemarch. It's been a long time since I've read those, and both are complex enough to keep me busy for a while. I guess I'd end up with Middlemarch, just to have Dorothea's company.

You also get to take a luxury item, but I can't really think of one. I guess I care more about books and music than about luxury items. If anything I would want to have the predictable endless supply of pen and paper, to do an endless amount of writing. Or should I maybe opt for my binoculars, I'm sure my island is full of the most stunning birds....

How did I get here in the first place, all I really wanted was the peace and quiet of a desert island....

Swifts

They really are back now, the Swifts. I can see them soaring past my window in small groups, I can hear them through the open window, their acrobatics are amazing as ever. They are just so wonderful to watch.

Swimming Again

I managed to swim for another hour today, but it was more of a social experience, I guess. Yesterday it was lovely and quiet and I could just swim without thinking too much. Today it was a lot busier, and I needed to pay attention to avoid collisions.

It does amaze me sometimes. I mean, what is wrong with men? I know the age of chivalry is long past, and maybe it wasn't all it's cracked up to be, but it seems to me we're heading to the other extreme. I sometimes think men were asleep under a tree somewhere when evolution provided us with a social gene. One man tried to overtake two women in the pool today, but only nearly missed me and created such waves I had to stop to breathe. And then there are all these types who simply don't see you. I know men have trouble with peripheral vision, but this was absurd. It's really a matter of simple courtesy and good manners, but I probably am hopelessly old-fashioned. It's a good exercise for me, I guess, sticking to my own course and not getting distracted or upset. I need to practise more though, I'm not very good at it yet.

Summer Is Here!

I just saw my first two Swifts for this year from my office window. Summer is here! This has really made my day. I love the sound of Swifts in the city, and I love to watch them fly, those unmistakable silhouettes whizzing past at great speed. One of the joys of summer.

Gift

My gift for today was an hour in the swimming pool, almost uninterrupted, just swimming and dreaming.

Wishful Thinking

Sometimes you look out your office window from the corner of your eye, and just for a moment you mistake your gulls for albatrosses as they glide past. Or is it just wishful thinking?

Books Again At Last

There are times when I can quite easily read three or four books a week and enjoy every single one. The past few months I haven't really been able to read much at all. There always is so much to do and so much to think about that I just haven't been able to settle down to anything much.

Last Friday I actually read two books though, and loved both. I had started Peter Ackroyd's new book "The Fall of Troy", about an archeologist and his wife working on an excavation in Turkey, supposedly of Troy. The archeology is a good background for the way the relationship between the two is portrayed, and for the way it develops. It reminded me a little of "First Light", the novel that made me a fan of Ackroyd's.

Then I read a book by a Belgian novelist called Kristien Hemmerechts, about two sisters growing up. A strange and slightly unnerving book, but intriguing and beautifully written. I love her books because she is always pretty straightforward but poetic at the same time. There is great insight in her work.

Sunday I finished my reading weekend with another Dutch book, the one that recently won one of our country's major literary awards. I'm not too sure about that one, because I really like the premise, the way the book is set up and the feelings in there, but at the same time I'm not sure that it really works.

New Scars

Talking about scars. Cycling home from work yesterday I managed to hurt my ankle trying to avoid a cyclist coming along the wrong side of a canal. And then I ended up almost getting hit by a little van which was backing out and not really watching where he was going on. He just missed me, but I reacted a little slowly, and somehow managed to hit my finger on the brake of my bike, so I now have a blue finger. Oh well, at least I didn't fall over again.

Scars

Now that it is almost summer again you start to look at life differently. There still is a mark on my left leg from my fall into the hold of the Europa earlier this year that isn't hidden by my jeans every day anymore. It's almost three months ago now, but the scar remains, there is a bump and a small scar on my shin. I guess they'll stay as a permanent reminder. I have a few more of those. They've become physical memories.

There is a tiny scar on my forehead which I got when I was really small and I fell onto a milk jug. It's one I don't remember myself, so I must have been tiny.

And I have a couple of small scars on my left hand which I got from falling off my bicycle on Texel. I arrived there one day in the autumn, early in the evening, when a storm was blowing and cycled all the way up to the north, against the advice of the man at the bicycle rental company. It took a couple of hours, against the wind and in the dark, and I fell twice. The second time I hit a car coming out of a driveway, and I got a little damaged. Not sure about the car... The worst thing was that on arriving in De Cocksdorp at half past eight all the restaurants were closing and I ended up at the café having something hot to eat. It's become a favourite ever since, though, so in the end it wasn't too bad.

There should be a small scar behind my right ear from an ear operation I had when I was ten years old, but I've never seen it myself. Apparently it's no longer there anyway. When the surgeon who operated on me way back then examined me again a few years ago he couldn't find a scar and so reached the conclusion he never operated on me. But that is a whole other story.

I guess on the whole it isn't too bad really, considering how often I've managed to hit something, have fallen over or have fallen of my bike. In most cases the wounds heal and don't leave any mark, which is a miracle in itself.

Phones and Doors

The trouble with these new-fangled tiny cell phones is that you can't slam the phone down on someone when you're really angry. Instead you have to push this tiny button, which doesn't quite have the same effect. Thank heaven for doors.

Terns

I still can't believe the beauty of these birds, pictures of South American Terns that I took in Ushuaia last year:

Images

On my computer I've installed a programme which automatically refreshes the picture on my desktop. The nice thing about it is that you never know, when you close your programme windows, what picture you will find behind them, and so you can be surprised by your own pictures. I have a nice set on there, mainly with pictures from my Antarctica trips. Some are of myself, brave woman facing the elements, others are pictures I've taken and which turned out rather well. Let me give a sample:


Me being particularly brave in a big storm (picture by Rian)


Me guiding the ship through the icebergs (picture by Lex)


Magellanic Penguins on Isla Martillo


Giant Storm Petrel on Aitcho, Barrientos Island


Gentoo feeding its young at Hannah Point

Nostalgia

Finding all those films on Donny Osmond on YouTube really took me back. I spent most of today tidying and sorting out here at home, and couldn't resist going through my memory box. It's just an old box with some of the things I bought long ago, when I was a huge fan. I was a real teenager, wanting to know all about my idols, trying to find out any way I could, always looking for new pictures, more music. The walls of my bedroom were literally covered in posters. I still remember which albums were rare, which ones I never got, but only got to hear at a friends' house. At my school we were all Donny Osmond fans, no David Cassidy fans in sight. I was just beginning to learn English at the time, and I remember writing down the lyrics to the best of my ability. A few years later I threw them all away, because it turned out that what I wrote down didn't necessarily have anything to do with what was sung on the records.

I actually threw out quite a lot, something I do regret now. I'd made several scrapbooks, and got rid of most of them. Today I did find my very own concert review and the ticket for one of the concerts I went to. I still have very vivid memories of the concerts, or maybe of the events, rather than the music. I remember at the first one I went to, in Leiden, being near the stage, right in the middle of the crowd, and I remember just how hot it was. I remember I was wearing a chequered blouse and my Osmonds t-shirt, and I remember all the screaming. The second concert, in Rotterdam, a couple of years later, was much more organised and civilised. There were seats and a lot of people making sure we stayed in our seats. It didn't make such a vivid impression on me as the first one. I was a little older too, and maybe a little less dedicated. There just are a lot of good memories there.

Memory Lane

I've just discovered the joys of YouTube, and I had a great evening going back to old favourites. I was a great Donny Osmond fan in my teens, and there are some great films of him on the site. It's not just the music and going back to all the old favourites, it's also the other stuff that makes me feel he's a nice man with a great sense of humour. And he's still cute.

Kids Today

What do you say when you go babysitting a boy who is eight years old, and when he is told about the plight of the albatrosses offers his entire pocket money for the week, all 50 cents, to support the campaign. It leaves you speechless.

Mika's Music

I seem to keep coming back to the music all the time at the moment. I don't know why it is so important to me, but it is. I keep looking for new things, and I keep rediscovering old favourites. Today I heard Mika by chance. I'd seen him on "Later with Jools Holland" and wasn't impressed, then the cd turned up on the Luisterpaal, and I saw it several times but never actually listened. Then a friend had it and liked it, but I still didn't see anything special there, and then today I watched the clip, and it just made me happy. So I went and looked for more, and found more, and it's such joyful music.

Eleni Mandell

After all the energy and sounds of Zita Swoon in the big room at Paradiso, it was off to Eleni Mandell the next day in the small room. Totally different concert, but again, I enjoyed it very much. Not too crowded, not too much smoke, but some lovely songs. Everything about Eleni is deceptive. The sweetest songs aren't all that sweet if you listen to the lyrics, and she looks so nice and innocent too. She is a nice lady, but not that traditional.

She played my favourite, this wonderful song about the salt truck, and the man to rely on. And she played "Girls" the song that keeps going just the other way every time. And then a beautiful song like "Miss Me". All from the last album "Miracle of Five", that I found a little while ago. It is a wonderful cd. I like the music, but I really love the lyrics, and when I told her that she said: "I love words". I like that.

eleni's website

Mondoleone's Smiles

Leon Giesen has a song where he talks about being distracted during the day by the thought of making love the night before. It's a nice song, typical Mondoleone, because he has such an unusual view of something so familiar. If you go and see him in concert he has a lovely film of just people's faces, thinking the same thoughts, and it is a very sweet and moving film. As I was walking down the Overtoom today I saw a face just like that. I don't know what the girl was thinking, but it did make her smile. And that made me smile.

Zita Swoon

I don't know how to begin really. Long ago I heard this name, Zita Swoon, and I wasn't sure what it was. A singer? A band? I just liked the name, it intrigued me. Then I found out it was a Belgian band, another Belgian band. I watched a live concert on tv and didn't know what to think of it. I wasn't really all that impressed. Then I saw some of their videos and I was impressed by the music and by the creativity I saw in the videos. And there was this singer called Stef Kamil Carlens.

I bought some cds, listened to them, put them away and listened again later. Unusual music, something you need to get used to. Then I saw a concert announced for Amsterdam and I had to go and listen. So I was at Paradiso last night to hear this intriguing Belgian band, and it was so much better than I expected. I had a good introduction during the day, listening to the new album, Big City, on VPRO's Luisterpaal. The first song, "Pretty Girl", got me and I really like the album. The band played some of the new songs last night, and some old favourites.

Carlens is a great front man, he wore a beautiful red suit and danced and sang with a lot of energy. Nice eyes.

The new album is on the luisterpaal for a little while yet.